People Say Stupid Things, Pt. 2

Friday, December 13, 2013

I think this is one of my favorite videos right now. I've only been a mom to twins for 8 weeks and I think I've already experienced all of these questions and awkward situations. Just watch.


Before I was pregnant, I had already become more than aware that people say stupid things. It's just human nature. Battling with infertility was hard in itself, but being asked "why don't you have kids yet?" was just pouring salt in the wound. I think one of my favorite comments I had received during this time was "well at least you guys get to make money and buy furniture!" Yes, because furniture fills the void of infertility. Thank you for that. 

Now that I have twins I have experienced an entirely new set of awkward social encounters (as shown in the video above).  I understand that twins are unique and a foreign idea to most moms, but do people have to be so gosh darn NOSY?! Almost every single time I have been out with the twins I have been asked awkward, personal questions. The three below are my favorite.

"Do twins run in your family?" 
...aka "are they natural?" I have come to learn that this is a backwards way of asking whether or not I did infertility treatments to have these twins. Even though I have talked about my experiences a bit on this blog, it doesn't mean I want to re-hash this experience every day in the checkout line with a complete stranger. Infertility is incredibly personal! And so is how children are conceived! I can bet a lot of money that a woman with one baby does not get asked about the details of that child's conception. 

"Are you breastfeeding them?" 
First, why does it matter to you? My children are healthy, happy and fed. It should not matter if they are drinking breast milk or formula, especially since I don't even know your first name. Second, I'm not really wanting to talk about what I do with my boobs all day with you. Pumping? Breast feeding? None of the above? Not really your business, complete stranger.

"Did you deliver vaginally?"
It seems pretty obvious why this is an awkward topic for a dressing room attendant to ask me, but come on! I don't really want to talk about that part of my body right now. Moving on.

Now obviously if we have become friends or acquaintances and are having a sincere conversation these questions aren't so annoying! It's just the sheer nosiness that gets really old. I'm trying to figure out a way of responding to these questions and letting them know I feel uncomfortable without being rude. It's proving to be harder than one would hope. 

Anyway, thanks for indulging my rant. The moral of the story is that, well, people say stupid things. Life goes on! (and here's a picture of these cute little twins just for good measure)


7 comments:

Angela Joy said...

You go girl! I loved that video, it was so darn funny and addressed almost every ridiculous question. Next time just tell people that you "plucked Max and Clara off the money tree in your back yard." That should quiet them up!

Jessica Holly said...

wow. I swear people feel like they have license to say whatever they want whenever kids and/or pregnancy is involved!!!

tiffharston said...

I so understand this and apprecite this post! I have gotten tons of infertility stupid questions and imagine once we adopt, especially we we adopt a different race, the questions won't stop, they'll just change. Sometimes it's so hurtful and other times, you just gotta laugh!!

Jessy Carlisle said...

I love the "Did you deliver them vaginally?" It's like really people? And I'm even more glad that you had twins so all those type of awkward questions that I want to ask moms of twins, I can just save for you:) Love you!

Urban Nation said...

When people ask if they run in the family I just say, "they do now!" And keep on walking!

-Kara Ann. said...

ok, that video. seriously laughed so hard. you're the bomb camilley! :)

Amanda said...

So what do you do with your boobs all day? Haha! I hardly even ask my friends questions about feeding because it is such a personal and situation specific thing. Something about having babies make people think they can be all up in your business and way too many people are know it alls when it comes to baby stuff! Keep those cute pictures comin!